Kullervo wrote:
Eunuch-to-be FTM, sweating precipitously under her flowing locks, wondered why Caeser Salad always got to lead the Afternoon Chanting Session. He did not dispute Caeser's seniority, or the fact that the most senior moderator should be in charge all of the time. Still, he could not keep from privately wondering what it would be like to lead the Afternoon Chanting Session just once. In his idle moments, FTM saw himself leading the moderators in chants of "What has our Artist given us besides His Comic? Mighty Tacos and Chicken Wings." The sheer blasphemy of it all made him smile.
Poing wrote:
Anaea strolled into the room. The sight of her flowing hair, sparkling eyes, and huge tracts of land caused most of the men (and some of the women!) to pass out in awe and sweat.
The Parrot Lady seemed completely unperturbed by this development, and helped herself to a glass of punch.
Skullx2003 wrote:
Meanwhile Skullx sits in his mountain fortess, rapidly sketching out avatars to appease the growing throngs of people trying to knock down his castle gates...
*lightning crashes*
angrysunbird wrote:
Deep in Skullx's basement dungeon, under rags and chains, lies Dot, patiently scrapping away at the door with a straw.
Thorog the Slasher wrote:
She wished that the floor could be less hard, or that her hero Llefser would come to rescue her. She needed to hurry, or Thyla would never know of SkullX's plot to impersonate the cheif eunuch, get within her reach, and graffiti her avatar. Perhaps her horde of rabid fan-boys would batter down the gates for her...
drachefly wrote:
But more likely still was it that an infiltrator would come to her rescue. Some one of SkullX's avatar-making compatriots, but someone with admin sympathies.
"Inspiration!" Dot cried out.
SkullX revealed his presence on the other side of the door with a maniacal chuckle. "I'm curious what you've thought of this time, my dear... you keep thinking you've been inspired, but nothing ever comes of it."
Dot pondered the implications of this for a moment. She had no recollection of having said "Inspiration" before... so...
SkullX opened the door with an earth-shattering BANG. Dot leapt back. "Now, once again, you will reveal to me what you know... I'm afraid the amnesia side-effects are unavoidable, and the more you resist, the worse they will be... What is the secret of Necroglamour?"
"What are you talking about?"
"Whenever I kill people, it ends up ugly, but the dead bodies you make... er, used to make, were EXQUISITE!"
Alternate Torg wrote:
"NOTHING! I WILL TELL YOU NOTHING!" screamed Dot.
"I see, so you do know something!" sneered SkullX.
Dot replied rationally, "No, I don't. That's why I won't tell you anything."
"Oh."
drachefly wrote:
"So,", SkullX continued, " is this more of a case of, 'I would if I could, but I can't so I won't', or more of a case of 'I could if I would, but I won't so I can't'? On the other hand, you already said you don't know. But you must know, since you are the very mistress of Necroglamour."
"What?" answered Dot, but the exchange was mooted as the sound of the hordes of avatar-looting Sluggites beating on the door leaked into the room.
SkullX drew himself up to his full height, and refastened his massive Skull X avatar-mask.
"I must... deal with the rabble. I WILL get the secret out of you when I'm back."
Dot relaxed somewhat as he left, wondering: "What IS our beloved despot Thyla doing about this mess?"
Meanwhile...
dotwarner wrote:
...in a forest close by, a large Orc and his small but perturbed bird friend were walking along (well, the Orc was lumbering, and the bird was flying, but that's beside the point)
"Thorog," the angry sunbird chirped, "Are you sure we're not lost?"
"Don't be silly, my feathered friend," the Orc replied. " I know exactly where I am at all times due to my keen sense of direction! Thyla's castle should be over that next ridge. Are you prepared?"
The sunbird, still peeved, flew up above the treeline to confirm the Orc's theory.
"You dolt! There's a castle over the next ridge, but it's not Thyla's!"
hexnut wrote:
Meanwhile, a small rutabaga sadly ponders the vista of rolling, tree-strewn hills, tears forming in the corners of its large,solitary and mournful eye...
Thorog the Slasher wrote:
((OOC: I thought i was supposed to be the iq 20 orc who bash stuff, who doesn't know phrases like "keen sense of direction"...but hey. I can go the semi-intellectual/wordsmith if you want... i didnt want to type cast ya!-d ))
Thorog leant against a tree at the top of the ridge, observing the castle in the distance.
"You know," he said. "You're right. Thyla's castle never had those nasty stormclouds hanging around it. I wonder whose it is?"
He peered into the distance, frowning.
"Is it just me, or is there a crowd around the base of it?"
dotwarner wrote:
The sunbird glared at him. "That is definitely not the castle we are looking for. That is dank and old. Thyla's is full of sparkling glass spires! Where the heck did you lead us to?"
The two had been on many adventures together, since Thorog had left New Zealand due to a glut in the Orc acting job market--and the sunbird just liked to look at wildlife in other places, and now the angry sunbird was annoyed.
"Why dont you ever carry a map! this is the 17th time you've gotten us lost!" he growled (as much as a bird can growl, anyway).
Thorog looked contrite. "This is very strange. I know that we were on the right path when we encountered the mud bog. And the kind witch of the Jade Phoenix told us to go this way when we were unsure of the correct path. Do you think she steered us wrong?"
The sunbird looked even more annoyed now, and shouted "Of course she did! She's a witch for gods sake! and I told you at the time we shouldn't listen to her!" He ruffled his feathers and perched on a branch. "So, now that we're here, i guess we should go ask at that castle (assuming we can get through the crowd of strange people below) and see if they have any information on our CORRECT destination."
Thorog nodded, and the two headed down the hill.
drachefly wrote:
As they approached, elements of the crowd thronged toward them. One poster said, "Look! That avatar looks like SkullX did it!"
Another agreed. "How did you get that?"
Another was more frustrated. "Maybe we can make a copy?"
The second whacked the third. "Fool! Avatar theft is only legal on April 1, by order of the gracious despot!"
"But he'd still have it!" retorted the envious one.
Thorog eyed the sunbird, then the rioters. "Did I hear you mention a despot? Thyla, perhaps? Can you direct me to her castle?"
"Of course... if you help me get inside the Castle Grayskullx!"
Thorog considered. "OK. Tell me."
"Follow around swamp until it becomes a stream, then proceed downstream past the den of the Salamander. Shortly after that should be the castle. Now, get me in there!"
Thorog considered for a moment. That crowd wasn't going anywhere. "Take my hand."
The volunteer warily accepted the orc's vislike grip. Thorog abruptly pulled him up, and began swinging him around his head until there was enough speed... so!
The volunteer arced over the crowd and through the eye of the castle, into the main solarium.
ASB asked, "You should look into the Hammer-throw. Who was that, anyway?"
"Beats me."
Thorog the Slasher wrote:
Nurgle landed heavily on the solarium roof before the tortured glass broke and deposited him on the floor. He groaned in pain as he lay there, wishing it would stop hurting so much.
He hadn't wanted to join a protest. He'd just been along because someone mentioned cheeses. Later on it turned out it was actually a minor religious obscenity, but by then it was too late.
So now he'd been thrown over a castle wall, stabbed by glass, and was now lying, groaning, on the floor. This was shaping up to be a bad day.
quesoLOCO27 wrote:
'Twas then that Our Lady Cheese, The Virgin Dairy herself descended from the heavens, kneeling by Nurgle's side.
"Aw, nuts!" Lady Queso exclaimed, snapping her fingers as her slinky red dress disappeared, revealing her 2-piece lifeguard suit. "Nurgle, lover of cheese, struck down in his prime.... And nobody here to recessitate him...!"
Without further ado, Lady Queso stood and tip-toed away from the mess of glass and Nurgle, only tripping over her red pumps twice.
"Dang shoes! I wonder if Thyla can delete them from my self-image...."
Sorceress wrote:
Unbeknownst to the rest of the crowd, however, a small band of fangirls(and one fanboy), were walking towards the Skullx's castle discussing Bishonen.
"Well, we all know that Spike is the one for me" said Crossroads as they made their way down the road. "I mean, he's just SOOOO drool-worthy."
"You can have him." grinned a lively young Sorceress, walking alongside him "Just as long as I get my Riff."
"YOUR Riff? Excuse me, but Riff is DEFINENTLY mine." said RTC looking offended
"I've had him longer" Sorceress retaliated, sticking out her tongue. "He's mine. So, are you still mad for Magus?" she asked the radioactive catgirl next to her, changing the subject and thereby winning the argument.
"Naw, I'm pretty much over him now that I have my boyfriend." Plangkye replied. "However" she added "That doesn't mean I won't lust after any other bishies, especially if their hot, dark, and angsty."
Talia rolled her eyes. "Angst? Who needs it. I'll stick to the more cheerful ones like Nightcrawler, thanks."
"Yeah, me too." added Sorceress, as they rounded a bend. "Hey! Wozzat castle?"
"I dunno." said RTC, looking at it nervously. "But that crowd of people doesn't look happy..."
~Sorceress
MOOP!
(((OOS: No offence meant to any of the above.)))
Angel wrote:
One of the crowdspeople notices the fan-group, and points at the catgirl. "Hey, she draws avatars!"
A small voice spoke up from the crowd. "Yeah, she made me a nice--"
"AFTER HER!!!!" The crowd roared, rushing towards the fan-group in one massive mob...
...Except for one obscure boy with a baseball bat slung over one shoulder. "Aw, nuts." muttered Dodger77.
Sorceress wrote:
Plangkye starts running for her life and is quickly joined by Crossroads, who also makes avatars.
Sorceress starts snickering, and wanders over to Dodger. "Hey babe." She says with a grin. "NIce to know you're not mixed up in all that nonsense."
~Sorceress
MOOP!
RiffsTrenchcoat wrote:
RTC follows Sor, who are both inconspicuosly hiding the fact that they both also make their own avatars, hoping that no one will notice.
"I make it a point to not excorcise all that much. Running is bad for me, you know." RTC crosses her arms.
Sor just gives her a really weird look.
dotwarner wrote:
Meanwhile, Dot watches the ruckus out the window of her prison.
"Dammit," she thought. "Maybe i should figure out some way to be rescued." She did, of course, want to be rescued. Really. Although being here locked up was a great excuse not to do her kingdomly duties, like reading miles of spammy WGARS threads, looking for violations.
She heard someone outside her chamber. "Oh great" she thought, "Skullx is back." She rolled her eyes.
She looked out the tiny window of her cell and saw a young knight, somewhat disoriented, wandering down the hallway.
"Hey you!" she called.
The boy looked up, still a bit confused and bruised.
"Was it you who just came through the window over there?" dot asked, solicitously. "Hey, you're Nurgle, Thyla's pageboy. What are you doing here??"
The boy looked up at the window, "Oh, yeah, I guess. Well Kitoba and vee and drachfly said they were coming over here to have fun storming the castle, so i figured i'd tag along. Then i got thrown through a window, or something. Not rightly sure."
Dot eyed him. "Hmmm, you don't look like a hero, but perhaps you could be a messenger. Can you get word to those outside that i'm stuck in here? I need rescuing! (Preferably by some hot sluggite boy!). You can go down the staircase to your right to get out."
Nurgle smiled, excited to have a task, then remembered... "Hey! I just got in here! Shouldnt i do something here first?"
"Silly boy," replied dot. "You can let the fanboys/girls in, when you escape!"
He nodded and ran off.
Dot sighed...
Dark_Bun_Bun wrote:
Meanwhile, Dark Bun Bun lurked in the shadows, plotting
drachefly wrote:
"This news is most interesting! I must report this to my mistress, Thyla!" He thought to himself. His tiny bun-body slipped down between two of the stones of the wall and was gone.
****
Her olive finished, Thyla stood, and walked out onto the balcony of her palace to present her plan to her assembled lieutenants.
Caesar Salad shouted, "Ave Thyla!"
After a moment she waved down the cheers: this was business.
"My people! We have worked hard to carve out our niche in the web-wide world, among the behemoths around us. But nutured by the bounty of Sluggy Freelance, and selected by our appreciation of the nofty, we have risen to greatness in our domain.
"But today, we begin a new day of Sluggy.net! Today, we will reach out to those whose eyes have never seen the nifty, who have never worshipped the comic, who have never speculated in the reactions forum!"
Regaining her composure, she continued: "For we shall spread it among them, and they too will see its goodness, and forsake their barbaric ways."
Angel wrote:
The fan-group, plus Dodger77, has managed to escape the clutches of the Av-seeking mob, and now has returned to the castle.
Doing absolutely nothing.
"Why are we doing nothing?" asks Dodger.
"Because we can't get the door open, silly," replies Crossroads. "So we're just gonna stand here until something happens."
Plangkye digs around in her backpack. "I've got a sketchbook and some magic markers! Maybe I can draw something that will help us!"
After a long period of sitting around, Plangkye finally gets an idea. "Bless you, inspiration!" she whispers as she walks in front of the door, takes her red marker, and draws a big bullseye.
"What's the bullseye for?" asked Sorceress. Plangkye started to answer when she was interrupted by a loud noise.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA..."
"It's getting louder!" exclaimed Dodger.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA......"
"Okay, now that's starting to get annoying," muttered RTC. The group stands around the bullseye and looks up.
"AAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Someone's falling!" shouted Crossroads, and the group leaped to the side as Nurgle finally hit the ground, about two feet to the left of the bullseye.
"I...... escaped..... " the figure wheezed.
Peering down from her high window, Dot saw the figures on the ground and smacked her forehead. "The door..." she moans. "He forgot to unlock the door!"
Ipslore wrote:
Meanwhile...
A cloaked figure stands on a small hillock, watching the commotion around skullx's castle, especially Nurgle's fall from grace. "Hmm... could the time of the Prophesy be approaching? Possibly, but I've been wrong before. I should check this out."
Ipslore steps out of the shadows [oh, did I mention that he was standing under a tree?], revealing his cloak to be, not black, but rather a shockingly flourescent shade of neon purple. He turns to the hunchbacked form of his assistant. "Come, Raoul! We have work to do! And this time, make sure you bring the," and here he pauses dramatically, "pipe organ."
Mechamancer wrote:
A ruler comes flying out of nowhere and hits Raoul in the head causing him to drop the pipe organ. Mechamancer walks forward in his green robe with brown edging. The ruler jumps off the ground and into his hand.
"Now who needs rescuing? I have come to help!"
drachefly wrote:
Ipslore eye askance at the newcomer. "Now look here, I'm sure you're an excellent rescuer, but that was my assistant, not the captors you're looking for. See?" He pointed at his fallen assistant. "Assistant. Do not hurt. And over there," (he gestured appropriately) "are the captors of the august personage in question, whose identity I still have not determined. Have you got this? Assistant. Castle with captors. Assistant. Castle with captors. Do not hit the assistant."
He finally looked down to see how Raoul was doing.
"Oh consarn it. You've broken him for real this time. My henchman assistant premiums are going to be going up again..."
Mechamancer interjected, "I thought he was your assistant, not your henchman."
Ipslore focused on doing what could be done to get Raoul back to the shop in one piece, and responded, "Oh, he is, but the insurance company says he falls under the Beaker clause, whatever that means."
Mechamancer wrote:
Mechamancer sets off towards the castle. When he arrives he goes searching for the captive. Before long he is run into by sorceress.
"Watch where you are going!"
"Sorry but I am trying to rescue someone."
"Why didn't you say so before?"
Mechamancer walks briskly down the hallway in the direction he hopes is the captive.
"Follow me. I might need your help."
Dr_Quackzalver wrote:
Oblivious to all the noise, intriuge and general excitment, Dr_Quaczalver sleeps contently in his eternal prison of stone, deep beneath the earth....
However, ancient powers are once againg surging through the world, and Dr Quackzalver stirs.
Wile E wrote:
In the distance was a canine covered in a shiny silver film. The cranky coyote watched from afar and rubbed at her eyes. She was tempted to join in but someone had sprinkled coyote repellent on the second page and she was unable to follow what was happening after that due to the Cursed Scrollover. She shook her paw in the air and yelled, "DARN YOU LONG UNBROKEN LINE OF TEXT! Darn you all to heck!"
She shrugged her shoulders causing the silver material covering her to crinkle, "Curses, foiled again!". Wile E turned tail and trotted off to the land of Generalus Chatticus where there were no long unbroken lines of text she could not smite.
If only she were allowed to smite other things.
Looking back one last time she sighed, "Well, I didn't really want to go to WGARS anyway ... 'tis a silly place."
Poing wrote:
Over in Genaralus Chatticus, a blue kitten sits at the feet of furious debaters. She watches silently as arguments are thrown back and forth, but says nothing, knowing she doesn't know nearly enough about the economy to contribute anything useful.
She waves her paw as Wile E approches. "Welcome back! How'd you like WGARS?"
Shadowcory666 wrote:
Strolling across the pathways of WGARS, Shadowcory returned from his holiday to Real Life. It was okay for a bit, he supposed, but it wasn't a place to live in.
He looked onto the various pubs scattered around the place- Ah, The Random Silliness got another paint change. They seemed to be doing it every week before he left.
And there were a few new contenders around, too. It looked like everyone was trying to start up a good talking point around here.
(OOC)-Did anyone else get Shrek vibes from the Thorog parts? That was my inspiration ;) -d
quesoLOCO27 wrote:
As Sorceress and Mechamancer round the corner, they hear a very distinct cry for help.
"This way!" announces Mech, grabbing Sorc by the arm, dragging her down a hall and to the right where Lady Queso is standing, sniffling. Her pumps are in one hand and a rook in the other.
"Queso...?" begins Sorc. "See! I KNEW that wasn't the cry of Dot!" she announces, crossing her arms.
"What seems to be the problem, miss?" asks Mechamancer the Suave.
"They locked me out of the Jetta again!" the Lady in Red bawls. "I never get to play chess! And these dratted shoes keep making me TRIP!"
Mechamancer and Sorceress look to eachother, confused.
"Well, what do you want US to do about it?" askes Sorc. "We're trying to save Dot!"
Lady Queso blinks. "Dot? So THAT's who Skullx has locked up in the top of the tower! I know where THAT is...!"
"WHERE?" ask Mech and Sorc in unison.
"Right above the BOTTOM ot the tower," winks Queso as
drummer_dude haunts in with a rimshot.
Sorceress wrote:
Sorceress sighs and hits her head.
"Look miss...Queso is it? Look Miss Queso, If you would be so kind as to take us up to where Her Royal Dottiness is, I would be more then willing to repay you with my shoes."
Queso looks down at Sorceress's bright Orange hightops.
"Deal!" she says cheerful at the prospect of having better shoes.
~Sorceress
MOOP!
Dodger77 wrote:
Red Viking, one of Skullx's lieutenants, brings in a lunch tray for his master.
"For an evil overlord, you sure do care a lot about the masses to want to draw them all super nifty avatars." Skullx is busy drawing and doesn't answer him. RV shrugs and walks out of the room. As he exits, Dodger77 walks in unnoticed.
"Hello!"
(Skullx doesn't respond)
*ahem*
"HELLO!"
"I'm very busy Red- who are YOU? How did you get in here?"
"Doesn't matter, you wouldn't remember anyways. *smiles*. I walked in as Red Viking was leaving."
"He just let you walk in? He's supposed to be in charge of security how could he-"
"He didn't let me in. He just didn't notice me."
"But how..."
"I have that effect on people. Anyway, I was wondering if you could tell me where Lady Dot's cell is?"
(It takes awhile for Skullx to recover from the shock of Dodger's bluntness)
"I should have you executed for your insolence!"
"Probably."
Suddenly there is a large CRASH heard from below. Skullx turns his head toward the window, as Kleptoman's voice is heard.
"Sorry Boss! Just checking out the rocket launcher. thought the safety was on..."
Skullx shakes his head as he turns back to Dodger, but all he finds is an empty office.
skullx2003 wrote:
OOS: Dodger, you posted while I was writing this, so I had to revise it a smidge)...
So back to the machinations... er... the everyday goings-about of Skullx...
Muttering to himself, Skullx stands up and heads out of the room.
"OOOH... I'm all mysterious like... OOOOH... I can appear and disappear at WILL... mutter mutter..."
"Well, now it's time to pull out the big guns."
Trudging up the stairs of the tallest tower of his impervious fortress, Skullx tops in front of a heavy iron door, glowing with runes. Reaching beneath his robes, he pulls out a small gold skull on a chain. Holding the skull in front of the door, he yells out, "By the power of Skullx!"
The runes stop glowing and a faint <click> can be heard as the door gently swings open on its own. Inside is a windowless, circular, metal room, empty except for a control box on one wall. Striding up to the box, he opens it, revealing two buttons. One is marked "up", the other, "down". Stabbing at the "down" button with his finger, the door to the room swings shut.
A whiring noise eminates from below the room, as Skullx folds his arms into the sleeves of his robes. After a time the whiring stops and the door swings open again. Walking out of the room into an immense hangar, he yells out, "REMIND ME AGAIN WHY I HAVE TO GO ALL THE WAY UPTHAT TOWER TO TAKE THE ELEVATOR DOWN INTO THE BASEMENT??!"
Peeking out from behind a stack of blueprints and manuals, Kitoba yells back, "Subterfuge! You cannot argue with a good use of subterfuge to confuse one's enemy's. As I remember it, I was once playing this game of Mornington Crescent with this chap from Kent and I think that subterfuge helped me win that game *nod*. Yes, yes I think it did..."
Walking over to the desk Kitoba is sitting at, Skullx sighs. "I suppose you're right, but nevermind that, has Hexnut got her primed and running in tip-top shape?"
"Oh yes!", Kitoba grins. "Mecha Bun-Bun is all fueled, armed and ready to go!"
A man in blue oil stained overalls walks up, brandishing a large 3 foot metric wrench. "She's purring like a kitten, Boss!", the engineer exclaims as he put his goggles up on top of his head.
Skullx looks into the dark half of the hangar. "Excellent... most excellent..."
MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Crossroads Inc. wrote:
Crossroadslooks around, only he and Plangkye remaining in their small Band of fan-ies. Suddenly he stands up, clasping his trusty pencil.
“Whoa!”
“What is it Crossroads?”
“I sense a grave disturbance in the plot!” He said as from fall away he could feel the tremendous forces of Skullx gathering in castle Greyskullx.
“Consarnit! Sorceress should have been back by now with Lady Dot! We must hurry… Great evil is coming” he said gravely as laid Nurgle in the safety of a PlotHole until they returned.
Sorceress wrote:
(((OOG: I just want to day that, Dodger, your post made me laugh SO HARD!!)))
Finally, Sorceress, Mechmancer, and Queso stand outside the door to Dot's cell.
"Dottles?" calls Sorceress tentivaly, as she opens the door.
"Hey there! Thanks for saving me." Dot said cheerfully, as she walked out of the cell.
[quote"dotwarner"]They started to walk out. "Wait," Queso said, pausing.
"Wait, Dot NEVER answers to Dottles. And the real dot is much more caustic than this--this girl is much to sweet! This isnt the real Dot!! "
The three rescuers spun around and looked at their rescue-ee.
She suddenly started to shimmer before their eyes.
"Darn it!" the apparitional shape, which crystalized into Inspiration before their eyes. "Skullx is gonna kill me for screwing this up!"
"Darn it!," Sorceress said with a start. "We rescued the wrong WGARS mod! And it looks like she didnt even need rescuing!"
"Ya think so?" Mechamancer asked.
"Duh!", Sorceress replied. "Look, she doesnt even write in olive! Obviously, she's here as a guest of skullx.. and we were meant to find her and think she was Dot!"
"Here, I'll prove it!" Queso added. She took an adorable kitten with huge Paws out of her backpack, and let it loose in front of inspy.
"Ohhhhhh Paws!!!" the fake Dot/inspy replied. "I want!!"
And she chased the kitten down the coridor.
"Now what do we do?" Sorceress looked at her companions in confusion.
"So now what?" Asked Mechmancer.
~Sorceress
MOOP!
Gojira wrote:
Queso pondered her and Sorceress's predicament. She pondered Alfalfa. She pondered the other Alfalfa. She pondered them both covered in cheese.
"Oh, This is getting me Nowhere, I've got to actually think! The fate of Dotwarner, nay, All of WGARSdom rests at my brightly orange sneakers!"
"Maybe we came to the wrong tower." Mechamancer quiped, from behind Sorc and Queso.
Queso wheeled on Mechamancer "Yes! That's it exactly! Skullx didn't imprison Dotwarner in the Tower of Castle Grayskullx! He captured the other tower renowned throughout the land!"
Her finger stabbed out at the horizon, "In the absence of it's master, he's captured the home of Crossroads Inc.! Skullx has Dot imprisoned in the Tower of Crossroads Central Command!"
{Whoops, thanks Crossroads, didn't mean to flub your name
Thorog the Slasher wrote:
Thorog finally made it to the top of the cliff. Rock climbing was not one of his best points, but it made do. The tower was large and impressive, with three "C"s engraved on it.
Behind him flew the Angry Sunbird, still following him. "This isn't the right castle either!" he said. "Thylas had a distinct lack of C about it."
Thorog examined the castle. It shot up into the sky like a giant tower, which may have been because it was, in fact, a giant tower. Thorog stood there, with his hands on his hips, staring up to the top.
The Sunbird alighted on his shoulder. "Do you think the architect was compensating for something?"
Thorog glared at the Sunbird. "Look, there's slight alusions to popular movie culture, and then there's outright plagarism."
The Sunbird hung his head. "But it had to be said!"
Thorog sighed. "Look, just pass me the rope and grapnel. If there's no one around, I'm finding someone and asking directions."
Poing wrote:
At that moment, the blue kitty appears, having realized that she missed the "silly place," and wanted to return to her homeland. She now wears a jaunty hat with a big feather that she found on the side of the road and carries her trusty sword.
She jumps down out of a tree and gallantly points the sword at the orc and Sunbird. "Ho-ho! What is this? An allusion to the sequel of the allusion to popular movie culture?
Um...you guys look lost. For some rock candy, I'll be glad to be your guide."
Alternate Torg wrote:
Thorog says, "Well, if you'll put down that sword, I'll give you some rock candy."
He then turns to Sunbird, "You got any rock candy on you?"
"Do I look like I got pockets?" retorts the bird.
Ipslore wrote:
Meanwhile...
"So, how bad is it?" asked Ipslore nervously.
"Pretty bad, actually. That thing's in there real deep," replied the mechanic, nodding at the ruler embedded in Raoul's forehead. "Oh, and take a look at this:" The mechanic pulled a small ball-peen hammer out of his overalls and rapped Raoul on the knee. Raoul's eyes flashed yellow and his hair stood on end, accompanied by a high-pitched scream. "Yeah, it's real bad when they do that."
"But what can I do?" asked Ipslore. "I sort of need a sidekick if I'm to rescue dot, you know."
"Well, this guy here will take me about a week. If ya don't want to wait that long, though, I guess I could find ya something..." The mechanic turned and began rummaging through a nearby pile of junk. He pulled out something brown and withered and handed it to Ipslore. "Here ya go, fella. This should do the trick."
Ipslore stared at it. "It's... a fish. On a string. And it's dead."
"Look, buddy, do ya wanna sidekick or not?"
"Oh, all right. I'll take it. Say, could you tell me how to get to the Crosstime Tower?"
doombringingbunny wrote:
As the trio of Queso, Sorceress, and Mechamancer run into thecourtyard of Castle Grayskullx, they are confronted by a man with dark coat, sunglasses and a beret.
"Stop right there! Indenify yourselfs!"
"I am Queso, and these are my companions, Sorceress and Mechamancer. We are looking for the lost mod, Dot."
"You too, huh? Well than I have no reson to fight you. The names Doombinger, level 74 Jedi Consular, and owner of Doom Inc. Jck, bring around the dropship."
Mechamancer was about to say somthing to the effect "Who the *Beep* are you talking to?" but was drowned out by the scream of engines. Over the side wall of the castle came a ship named The Ebon Hawk.
"IS THIS YOR SHIP?"Sorceress yelled over the engines.
"THIS LITTLE THING? I USE IT AS A PUDDLE JUMPER TO THE LANCER! ONCE WE GET THERE WE CAN USE THE DOOMTAINUM DRIVE TO GET TO CROSSROADS TOWER!"
"HOW DO YOU NOW TO GO TO CROSSROADS TOWER?"
"I'M A JEDI, REMEMBER?"
As these words where still echoing in our heros heads, out pops CptnJckSprrw.
"SORRY, WOULD HAVE BEEN HERE SOONER, BUT THE LOAD TIME GETTING OFF THIS THING IS HELL."
And so starts a new chapter, with less magic, more aminsia dust, and more nifty gadets!
Mechamancer wrote:
Mechamancer jumps on the ship.
"Did some one say more gadgets?"
"Yes they did" says sorceress.
"DO you think we should follow him?" asks Queso
"Why not" responded sorceress
"This dialog sucks!! Hurry up so we can get on to more action!" Mechamancer yells from inside the ship.
Dodger77 wrote:
Dodger, who had recently caught up with Sorceress and co. trys to board the ship, but the doors closed just as he was about to go through.
"Aw, nuts" he muttered under his breath.
"Guess I'll have to find someone else to show this 3-ring binder entitled 'Skullx's Secret Super-Evil and Nefarious Plot to Take Over Sluggydom, MUAHAHAHAHA!.'
So Dodger wanders off to find Cross Roads and them.
Fortunately, it wasn't long before he found them.
Unfortunately, The notebook only contained one page:
Skullx's Secret Super-Evil and Nefarious Plot to Take Over Sluggydom MUAHAHAHAHA! wrote:
1) Imprison a fake Dotwarner to lure lots of noble sluggites to the castle.
2) Unleash Ultimate Weapon.
3) Rule the World.
"D'oh. Sorry guys I should have looked at this earlier.
Fortunately, no one noticed him, or how embarrassed he was.
Unfortunately, That's exactly when the explosion occured.
doombringingbunny wrote:
"...and so if found the 'Skullx's Secret Super-Evil and Nefarious Plot to Take Over Sluggydom, MUAHAHAHAHA!.' plans and knew they were fake.
I mean, he can't be that stupied, right?" Doombringer drawled while sitting in the common area.
"You haven't been here long, have you?" Sorceress replied.
"No, no I haven't, why?"
"No reason."
"We're here." Cptnjck said over the com system.
"Good, god. Where did you get the money to get this ship?" Queso said in aw at the expance of the hover carrier Lancer.
"I'm a Jedi. Check that thread on how we make money." Doombringer replied cooly,"I have to go enage th Doomtiaum drive, go take the elevator too your right, go six floors down, and when you walk out take a left. the first three doors are your rooms. The fourth is a door to the armory. We should get to the tower in half an hour. If you need anything, ask one of the Marines walking around the ship."
"Armory?!?!" Mechamancer screams and runs to the elevater.
"What a strange friend you have."
"You don't know the half of it."
Thanks to Skullx for being a good sport!
Crossroads Inc. wrote:
-Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-
"CLEAR!" Kra-ZRUMP!
-Beep beeeeeeeeeeeee
"CLEAR!" Kra-ZRUMP!
-Beep beep, Beep beep
"Whew! Thought it was almost dead!"
Dark_Bun_Bun wrote:
DBB stares in awe at the released Dr q. suddenly he starts to wonder if that was a good idea
Mechamancer wrote:
suddenly the power to the ship cuts out. The red emergany lights come on a second after everybody ran into the furniter in a panic.
They all rush down to the engineering room where they find Mechamancer knee deep in parts.
"Cool ship you got." he says
"What have you DONE!!" screams doombringingbunny.
"I just wanted to see how it worked. I got lost on my way to the armory. Could you please show me where that is again?" He looks at the dissassembled engine as if noticing it for the first time. "I hope that isn't bad. You can fix it right?"
With that he turns and walks out of the room to look for the armory.
". . . mwha." doombringingbunny explains.
Sorceress walks over and comforts him. "It will be ok. I sure you can get it fixed."
Queso leaves the room before she has a fatal attack of giggles.
Then there is an explosion.
Angel wrote:
Back in the cheerful, sunny forest, Thorog, Poing, and the still-rather-irritated Sunbird now stand in front of Crossroads Central Tower. The sunbird is perched on Thorog's shoulder, and is still grumbling about the whole ordeal, while Poing swaggers around, swishing the little saber and flicking at the feather in her hat. Thorog just stares purposefully at the tower, trying to remember why in the world he was doing this in the first place.
As the trio stands around waiting for something to happen, Poing suddenly stops and points her saber at the sky. "Look!"
They all look to see a glowing ball falling out of the sky, trailing flames and billowing black smoke. "I think they're in trouble!" exclaimed the sunbird, which drew a dirty look from the other two.
"No.... ya think?" Thorog muttered. "Still, what are we gonna do?"
They were racing toward the still-falling ship when there came shouts from the surrounding forest. An average-sized girl with braided auburn hair and brown monk's robes comes running out of the forest, accompanied by a tall silver-haired girl with a black trenchcoat and several different weapons strapped to her back.
"Go!" shouts Talia Karn, and the air is instantly choked with a blue color, and the smell of sulfur. Seconds later, everyone on board the ship is now safely on the ground, surrounded by little blue men with pointy ears and tails. "Way to go, BAMF Army!" Talia shouts with glee, and the BAMFs all grin.
"Umm.... " Mechmancer looks up into the sky, and sees that the now-empty ship is headed straight for them.
"I'll take care of it," Angel said confidently. She reaches behind her back and pulls out a rocket launcher. Aiming carefully, she hits the ship square on the nose and it breaks up in large, exploding chunks. With the group still in danger, she drops the launcher and reaches behind her back again, drawing a pair of scimitars. With anime-style moves and effects, she becomes a blur, slicing and dicing until the group is surrounded by little molten bits of twisted, scarred metal.
"Anybody hurt?" she askes, sheathing her swords. Catching a glimpse under the trenchcoat, DoomBringingBunny sees more knives, swords, and guns than he's ever seen in his life. He shakes his head quickly.
"So who are you?" Sorceress asks carefully.
"I'm Talia Karn, an ally of Queen Dot. I came here with my BAMFs when I heard she was missing." Talia said cheerfully, and a little BAMF came up to sit on her shoulder.
Crossroads looks cautiously at Angel, who grins. "I just like to blow things up. And I like swords. And knives. And... okay, I'll stop."
quesoLOCO27 wrote:
"Hey wait a minute -- has anyone seen Queso?" asks Sorceress, looking around.
"Maybe she exploded with laughter," notes Mechamancer. "I mean... it's not like I caused that explosion or anything...."
"Grrr," adds DBB.
"The Cheese was with you? She shall be sorely missed!" announces Poing as all lower their heads in reverence.
All but Thorog.
"What're we standing around HERE for?" he demands. "We should get a move on!"
"Have you no respect for the dead?" Sorceress inquires, poking Thorog with her index finger.
"Of course I do," he buffets, "but there's a No Loitering sign posted to that tree...."
*badum-chik!*
Crossroads Inc. wrote:
Angel wrote:
Crossroads looks cautiously at Angel, who grins. "I just like to blow things up. And I like swords. And knives. And... okay, I'll stop."
Crossroads relaxes a bit after seeing the display "Oh, that is quite ok, you seem to be using Anime in your moves, And hey, if your using Anime, your Ok by me! Now then AM I too understand that someone has "Cut the Cheese" of QuesoLOCO? Nay! She is far to hardy for that!
We must not concern ourselves with matters beyond our realm! The task at hand, as the only other Massive Tower of DOOM, My tower must be were Skullx is keeping the REAL Lady Dot! No we must hurry!"
He says urging Pirate Sorcerss, DBB, Thorog and The Angery SunBird onwards.
Angel wrote:
As the groups hurries off towards the other tower, they leave behind an unnoticed tragedy. For lo, behind them had been many unknown people lurking in the bushes. They came to a tragic end, cut down by molten bits of twisted, scarred metal.
doombringingbunny wrote:
"DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG I TOOK ME TO CREATE THE LANCER! THE FUNDS I HAD TO GET! I HAD TO GET APPROVAL OF THE BORAD OF DIRECTERS! YOU EVER TRYED TO GET THEM TO APPROVE A MULTI-BILLION SILLIDOM PROJECT?!?!?!?!? IT'S ALMOST IMPOSSABLE! YOUR LUCKY YOUR LUCKY THE BAMF ARMY IS HERE OF ME AND MY BOYS WOULD KICK YOUR."
But he never finishes his sentance, as the Crossroads Central Command Tower Defences suddenly come to life.
"Wait! Let me hande this!" Crossroads yelles to the others,"Ein!"
"Voice print valied, password?" Droned a metalic voice from inside the great tower.
"Piano Black!" Crossroads sayes in a commanding tone.
"Password invalied, you will now be terminated, have a nice day."
And all the noble Suggites and ettes share in a colective "poop!" and dive for cover.
"Alright Marines, disable those defences, and help the BAMF army and the suggites anyway you can. BRING ME DOT!" DBB said in a commanding tone over the radio.
"You. You," he turns to Mechamancer," after this your mine."
And so the battle for Dot began.
Thorog the Slasher wrote:
Meanwhile, on the other side of the tower, a grappling hook flies over the battlement.
Several minutes later, an orc pulls himself over the edge of the wall and flops onto the ground.
Mechamancer wrote:
"How could you expect me to not mess with wires. You had them all colour coded so I thought THat it would be easy for you to put it all back together. Besides you said so yourself, your a jedi and jedi have lots of money. And another thing, why is this thread dying right when we are about to save the helpless damsel in distress?"
doombringingbunny wrote:
It took me years to build it, and my super credit card doesn't work in this galaxy. I had to start my own business to get the money. Ya and it did start to die at a werid point, didn't it? Maybe I because I haven't been on all that often too keep it going."
Suddenly, the defences(GAH! why do i keep miss spelling that word?) shut down.
Angel looks up from her rocket lancher scope as they shut down and mutters "aww, man."
The door starts to open slowly and every gun (which is a lot conserdering that 2 battlions of Marines and Angel were there)was trained on the door and out pops Thorg, Poing, and a irritated Sunbird.
"I said 'lets take the elevator,' but nooooooo, orc boy here is sacred of them. You call you self an orc, you should be ashamed." Sunbird said, glaring.
"Hey, they just give me the creeps. Besides, you just gilded down." Thorog mutters.
"Stop it, both of you. I mean come on, I mean theres a time for acting like childern, but this is not.... wait, yes it is."
"Umm sir? We have a problem." The barly esistant sidekick CptnJck said with egency in his voice.
"What do you mean, It's almost over!" Talia Karn says with the Nightcrawlers behind her nodding in argeemet.
"Well, many of you remeber the time DBB started that RPG about zombies that never got off the ground?"
"Yes." All the sluggites/ettes said angerly. DBB hung his head in shame.
"Well, we still have some T-Viris left over, and, look behind you." The Cpnt says pointing behind them.
"Well that might be a problem."
"Who the *beep* are you?" DBB says to the now noticed Doger77.
"It doesn't matter."
"Your problebly right. We need as many guns as we can get, and Crossroads? Were going to be here for a while. Everybody inside!"
EDIT: Missed accople sentances, Shorry.
Angel wrote:
"What's this?" Angel asks once the group is comfortably lodged in the X-roads tower. "You say you have an army of zombies that needs to be eliminated?" She pulls a sniper rifle from underneath her trenchcoat and starts cleaning the barrel.
"Something like that," replies Crossroads as he sits in the command chair and runs a system check. "As long as we're in here, we should be safe... unless the find The Button."
"What's The Button?" queries Dodger77.
"The Button," intones Crossroads, "is a big shiny red button on a tree outside the tower. It has a big sign above it that says 'Don't Press This Button Unless You're Crossroads And You Forgot Your Keys Again.' Not one of my better ideas, I'll admit, but boy does it come in handy sometimes."
"So the zombies have a way to get in?" asks the rather vexed Sunbird, voice laced with sarcasm.
"So it seems," mutters Dodger. "Hey, where'd Sorceress and Plangkye go? And where's Thorog and Poing?"
"They went with Talia Karn and RTC to try to find Dot in the tower." Angel replies. "I would've went with them, but I can see that my talents will be much more useful here."
"DBB and CptnJck are setting up the Marines in strategic places around the tower entrances, and Mechamancer has been duct taped to a chair to avoid further mishap," recaps Crossroads. "The system check is complete, and everything in the tower checks out okay, except for the top few floors. That's probably where we'll find our next clues concerning the whereabouts of Dot."
Suddenly the comm system crackled. "CptnJck to Crossroads. The zombies have found The Button!"
"All hands on deck! Battle station!" Crossroads roars into the microphone.
Angel puts away the cleaning rag and pulls out a box of ammunition. She loads the rifle, a dangerous smile on her face. "Let's saddle up!" she orders, and cocks the rifle. "It's party time."
Mechamancer wrote:
Using his knife Mechamancer manages to cut his bonds. He runs to the deck where everyone is gathering. He readies his ruler as the door begins to shake.
"You didn't have to tie my down. I can still be helpful!" he yells.
"Just so long as you don't blow us up you can help." Crossroads replies.
Just then the first Zombies burst through the door.
doombringingbunny wrote:
DBB wips out his lightsaber and blaster pistol. Angel took aim. CptnJck drew his cutlass. Crossroads actvided the defences(I hate that word!). Nobody noticed Doger. Sunbird got extra pissed. The Marnies locked and loaded. They all thought "all hands on deck? this is a tower!"
"OPEN FIRE! OPEN FIRE!"
The first zombie gets riped to pieaces by thousads of bullets and energy bolts. Then came the thousands of others.
UPSTAIRS
"Crossroads to Plangkye! The zombies are through! we'll hold them off for as long as we can, but thats not saying much, 15, 20 minutes tops!"
"I understand. OK, you herd the man, we have 20 minutes. Lets find Dot!"
Poinging, sword drawn, lead the way, followed by Thorog, Plangkye, RTC, Sorceress, and, in last, Talia Karn.
They were walking in the powered down area and came to a door that said "Big Nifty Screen Thingy."
"Well, this is a good place to start, I guess." Sorceress sayes glumly.
"Sorceress? Glum? I think not!" RTC sayes as she enters the room.
"Dang it, I almost got you."
Suddenly, the large screen on the wall and a women appers on the screen.
"I must admit, I didn't think you'd get this far. Very impresive." She says withsarcasum in her voice.
Poinging had been pushed too far.
"You did this! Why? Why have you forsaken us!?"
"Publitcaty, my dear. A kiddnapping would bring reporters. Reporters, gawkers. Gawkers, new membership. Its very simple."
"Where is she?!" Thorog said with a blood-curtaling roar.
The woman laughted. "Dot was never kidnapped, we hired an actor. I imagine she is doing her duties as a mod."
"So, you mean, we did this for nothing? This was a false quest?" RTC asked sheepishly.
"Not false, my dear, but it was not for what you were told. But I have a new quest for you. As you have no douht noticed, there is a distinct lack of empoyees at Crossroads Inc. That is because I have them."She steps to the side to reveil Zonker,Mert, Bob, Merf, Zoozts."If you can get here, I'll give them up, if you can get here, though I douth that. Thank Doombringing for me. The murders resulting from his supity will cause more membership. Good luck getting out of that death trap." She start to laugh. It was Thyla.
Thorog the Slasher wrote:
As this is a PG-13 board, the next scene will be described in two words:
THOROG SMASH!!!!
ASB: Hey! I thought we were over with pop-culture references!
Crossroads Inc. wrote:
*Crossroads glared angrily at the screen as the lady vanished from view, he whirled around, staring at the assembled Sluggites*
"Well now! this is a terrible brined Cucumber if I have ever seen one... This is most unpleasant and down right disturbing!"
"Why what do you mean?" asked Angel.
"Well, First Lady Dot was kidnapped and taken to Castle GreySkullx, or so we thought... Then she was taken to my Tower, or so we thought... And just when we uncover the truth, conveniently and almost from nowhere, an Army of killer Zombies assaults my Tower, Which I might add did not even recognize my presence! And now, my very Employees have been stolen! Im going to be late with my next comic unless I get them back!!!"
"Your right! Something is terribly wrong here! It..its like we are all Pawns!" an angry Angry Sunbird shouted.
"It is worse then that! What we have here is something... UN SILLY! (bum bum BUM!!!) *The assembled suddenly gasped in horror!*
"Yes! You heard me, Things have been suffering recently from a terrible lack of Silliness and, worst of all, I think it is intentional! (bum bum BUM!!!) *Stunned by the accusation, Crossroads went on.
"Sure, we have had wars in the past, battles, but never with such ferocity before! This is not some clash of Bishi boys armed with pies; this is fighting for our very survival! My friends, this adventure has, I fear, gone beyond Un-Silly, it has been infected, nay corrupted by SERIOUSNESS!!! (BUM BUM BUMMM!!!)
"You can't be serious! This is the Land of Random Sillyness! Something serious would wholly alter the Realm!" shouted a distressed Dark Bun Bun...
"You mean alter it with something like... Murder!" *Gasp*
ASB "gasp!
DBB "Gasp"
DarkBB "Gasp"
Angel Gasp"
Random stage crew "Gasp!"
Angel spoke up "Gasp is right! The Land of Random Silliness’ has been tainted with... Seriousness! (bum bum BUM!!!) Angel stopped, the others looked around...
"Where is that darned dramatic music coming from?" Crossroads grumbled as the others spoke of the 'serious' situation.
doombringingbunny wrote:
"Wait! I have it!" DBB sayes as it dawns on him," WGRS is being over run by seriousness, and only one thing can combat that!"
"You mean?"
"Crossroads, arm the cheese cannons! Arm my Marines with pie! Prepare the moose! These zombies are agents of seriousness, and we must combat them with silly!" He sayes with a big grin.
Angel wrote:
Angel looks disappointed for a moment, then ejects the clip from her sniper rifle and stows it under the trenchcoat. She rummages around for a moment before pulling out dual m16's. Oblivious to the wide-eyed stares, she also pulls out a large wooden crate and starts rummaging through it before pulling out a handful of rather colorful ammunition clips. "The ultimate power in randomly silly ammunition... SKINT MITTLES!!! Taste the rainbow, you [multiple-word content deleted by management]!!!"
"Do you have a kitchen sink under that coat?" Dodger asks with a measure of sarcasm.
Angel looks over. "Porcelin or stainless steel?"
"Question withdrawn."
Angel wrote:
"CLEAR!!!!!!"
BZZZZZZT!!!!!!
dotwarner wrote:
Meanwhile, Dot knits a sweater in the dark dank recesses of her real captivity.
"This is rather dull" she thinks, wishing for a martini.
She rings the bell on the wall.
"Guard! guard! Can i have a martini please? Bombay Saphire, dry and slightly dirty?"
The small panel on the wall opens and a perfect martini appears.
"Wow. Sweet. Maybe being held captive ain't so bad if they make good martinis here."
Crossroads Inc. wrote:
Crossroads Inc. wrote:
My tower must be were Skullx is keeping the REAL Lady Dot! Now we must hurry!"
doombringingbunny wrote:
"Dot was never kidnapped, we hired an actor. I imagine she is doing her duties as a mod."
dotwarner wrote:
Meanwhile, Dot knits a sweater in the dark dank recesses of her real captivity.
Confond it all! We need to get our stories straight! Who has what with the Dot now! Things are becoming Silly! ((oh wait, we wanted that))
Onward Moose!
Dodger77 wrote:
Thyla:"...If I had told them that I actually had kidnapped you, it wouldn't have been nearly as interesting. Besides, I enjoy watching them run willy-nilly across the realms. I just hope willy doesn't get too tired."
Dot: Wait, what? I didn't say anything.
Thyla: Right. *She sips her martini, and with a "hic", she staggers out of the dungeon*
Dot: Wait, who the heck is Willy-Nilly? Oh well. *sip*.*hic*