I have a scenario that I would like to put forward and get your input on what your response would be in the situation. While I don't mind if the guys answer I am specifically looking for the female point of view on this. Anyway, here goes.

You have have decided you want to start dating or meeting people outside of your normal social circles. You have thought the one way to do this is through an internet dating site. You have found one guy sort of interesting and talked to him a few times online and have decided to meet him. You pick a public place to talk over lunch or coffee. You both arrive and start talking and everything seems to be going along fine and then you notice that there is someone with a video camera seemingly recording your conversation or date. What is your response?

There will be follow up questions and alternate scenarios to follow. Also this question presumes that you have decided to meet people this way so please keep responses in that context even if you decide to answer knowing you may never try to meet someone this way.

Well, I'd give the benefit of the doubt and ask if they noticed the camera. If so, do they know why they are filming? Why? Why would they allow/ask for this?
I'm willing to give them a chance for paranoia reasons as I have my own bouts of paranoia. I would feel violated in a way seeing as such a thing should be disclosed at first meeting. I met my guy online and met in person after months of online/text message conversation.

I'd probably conclude that the "date" was actually a prank, and sure to end in Borat-style punking/something revolting being spilled on me/the footage edited to make me look like a fool/my underpants being revealed to the world.

I think I'd try to follow Giggle's approach to the point I found out the guy was involved/responsible for the filming and then I would angrily demand why.

I can't see this ending well.

I would maybe be a little weirded out, but probably wouldn't say anything to the camera-person (I'm utterly nonconfrontational) (also, depending on how public -- like a park -- I support the rights of street photographers, so I wouldn't think I had any right to ask them to stop; a private business like a coffee shop, though, is different). I might point it out to my date. I certainly wouldn't think my date had anything to do with the person filming.

I'd also point it out to the date. And if the cameraman didn't shift away from me, I'd probably ask if we could walk or meet up somewhere else. And if the cameraman was found at another location, or followed us, I'd probably cut the date short, siting the weirdness of the cameraman.

Ok, it's been a couple of days. So the response is that they are recording the date to help the dater get better at interacting with women. They are going to go home and analyze the video for mistakes and try to make improvements for the next date.

If the other person had said this ahead of time I would have thought it sounded fun and probably agreed to it. But kir decision to keep it secret from me would make me incredibly pissed off. I would find kir suspicious and untrustworthy.

I think the dater would be better off finding a woman who the dater is not romantically invested in but feels comfortable talking about this with. Maybe even setting up a mock date where the woman can give pointers. I suspect the first thing she would suggest is don't film your date.

Well.... there is the whole thing that if you know you're being observed your behavior changes...

Then the other person would get no useful information from arranging to have kirself filmed!

I would leave. Like, immediately. While expressing disgust.

He asked me on the date under false pretenses to be a part of his own social experiment - AND he has the nerve to tell me that I'm the ginuea pig? By saying that he'll analyze the tape for mistakes and use that info for future dates, he's essentially told me that I'm not even worthy of a second date - I was only a pawn in his little "improve contact with women" game. Rude, rude, rude.

I'm not saying that some people don't need practice in talking to people, particularly to those they're attracted to. But this guy's actions have shown that he doesn't even see women as people. They are so freaky to him that he needs to film himself talking to them to create a play-by-play to properly interact with them - to create canned phrases to get the reaction he wants from them. That's bordering the whole pick-up artist crap that I hate so much.

So, yeah. I'd be pissed. Now, if he was upfront and said he was awkward and would I be willing to help him through a date, that would be different. But finding out I was filmed against my knowledge is all sorts of creeper.

Beyond what Insp said... there's no reason to keep it secret, except to avoid embarrassment with your female friends. You're already going to the trouble of getting someone to film it, so it can't even be avoiding embarrassment with your male friends, unless you hired him.

If you did that, then why not go the slight extra distance and hire an escort to be your date, instead of hiring a cameraman? Then you can get tips from someone who's seen a lot of date styles. And since it'd be a clean date, she might even consent to your filming it in such a way that her reactions can be seen (neither police nor pornographers would be interested in a clean date, and if she's single it wouldn't be at all compromising, if you can avoid mentioning her being an escort).

I do sympathize with the "trainee pick-up artist"s plight, but no matter what, that kind of thing is uncalled for. I believe it was Kea who brought my attention to the Dr. Nerdlove blog, and I think that blog's approach is a much healthier way to go about improving your interactions with the sex to which you are attracted.

So, using weatherwax's example, what if the date knows going in, full disclosure?